Also, please be mature about the subject matter, and be respectful. Any rude comments will be removed, and if that is not an option, the question itself will be removed.I am dating a transsexual, advice would be greatly appreciated?
First off I would like to Congratulate you and forward a huge nod of approval for your support and understanding of Transsexuality. You, and those like you, help me remember not all people are ignorant and mean.
I am a Transsexual girl, married, and a mother.
My suggestion, when she is ready to come out she will need tremendous support. I would highly recommend preparing yourself mentally to be able to provide unlimited support and advice. Coming out is never an easy process--we tend to lose those most closest to us and we face tons of pain with our self-esteem and confidence. A figure in her life, one of support and love, will get her through this.
Though it is rare everyone in her life will accept her transition, if this happens to be the case, your presence of support will remind her how much she is important to you and those around her.
I can't think of anything more important than the feeling of love and support through transition.
Also, the first few months after starting hormone therapy, she may feel very addicted to looking in the mirror--to see what changes are brought upon by having the correct sex hormone in her body. She may be looking for breast development, fat redistribution, etc. In my experience, each day waking up those early months of hormone therapy, it felt like Christmas morning!
A good compliment here and there will move mountains, even a subtle, ';You look great';.
This is a fun difficult painful exciting defining journey she is about to embark on. Just remember, she will be the same person in her heart, just more at peace with her body. Your support is greatly welcomed in her life and will ensure a much easier transition.
But don't fail to neglect yourself in the process, be sure to maintain positivity throughout. And if there comes a time you need your own boost, don't be afraid to talk it with her and/or to engage in activities together which brings something good, happy, and positive.
The absolute best of luck to you both. Goodluck!
I am dating a transsexual, advice would be greatly appreciated?
hormones emotional times are very tough!She needs hugs and reassurance and support
be with understanding people(new friends in worst case) prepared for the worst, and hope for the best
So far we have come out to my folks, and all our friends and none is lost! now we have her folks, religious to tell
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Im on the other end from you in that I am the one that needed to transition. I am also much older but that is not a issue. I lost my wife because of this but meet a great guy later. He fully accept me and what I am going through. He plans to be there when I go for surgery next year.
Early on I had a lot of issues with low self esteem and fear of rejection. I had just lost the one person I loved more then life. The best thing he could do for me was to just be there for me. To tell me I looked nice even when I knew I didn't. There were many times I just needed a shoulder to lean on or cry on and he would let me pour out what I was dealing with. He was there for me on the longest night of my life when I was not sure I would see the next day.
What I'm saying is be there for her. She has a long journey before her and will need someone that she can trust and love.
I'm a transsexual girl (yes, under 18) in a relationship with a femme woman (19).
I came out to my parents in September '07. It wasn't the easiest thing to do since I didn't know how to slowly sway the topic to that direction.
Long story short, I just said it.
Things today have been greater than ever. I guess I could say that i'm lucky to have such wonderful parents.
Everyone wants to 'come out.' And i'm sure your special 'she' will come out in her own way when the time is right.
Best wishes.
Hugs. Lots of hugs and love. It goes a long way just to have someone hold you after a long day of stress and tell you that you are doing okay.
That's how Lunchbox made all my bad days go away in the early months of getting my transition underway at college.
First off, please treat her exactly the same was as any born female. The whole purpose of transition is to get everyone to treat you as if you had been born and raised in the correct body, and to have the same life as others of your correct gender.
Next, transsexuals (ie., those who plan on or have changed their physical sex through surgery because of an inherent medical condition) tend not to come out like transgenders (any non-transsexual who lives or dresses outside their gender without evidence of a medical cause), homosexuals, and bisexuals. The whole reason for the surgeries and procedures is to hide and live a mainsteam, non-LGBT lifestyle. If you tell anyone you are a TS, then you have wasted all the money you have spent to make you look like a woman (or guy for FtMs). Having surgery to destroy your original sex so you won't be discriminated against and then going around blabbing it in order to be discriminated against or wear a chip defeats the entire purpose.
So TSs tend to transition rather than ';come out.'; The only type of ';coming out'; they do is when they annouce their medical problem to those who knew them as the fake person they were forced to be. That is no more ';coming out'; (with the homosexual connotation) than is telling family members you have another medical condition such as cancer.
Think of TSism as a medical condition, and TS women as women born with a serious medical condition and correcting it, not as ';men who choose to become women.'; Unlike with the TG, the true born-TS woman has no choice other than to fix their medical condition.
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